If you wonder why you are attracted to or react to certain personality types, here is an article that came to my attention. See if this relates to you…be curious…Dr. Kathy
The Hidden Cost of Childhood Trauma: Why We Seek Approval from Difficult People
We’ve all experienced challenging relationships. A toxic partner, a demanding boss, or a narcissistic family member can leave us feeling drained and emotionally exhausted. But have you ever stopped to consider why you might keep returning to these unhealthy patterns?
According to therapist Patrick Teahan, who works in the field of childhood trauma, a surprising sign of unresolved trauma in adults is the persistent desire to please others, even at our own expense.
“I think, for a lot of us, it’s about trying to get a difficult person to be good to us in our adult lives,” Teahan explains. He shares educational videos on YouTube and works with clients who struggle with the lasting effects of childhood trauma.
Teahan’s observation resonates deeply. The American Psychological Association (APA) and the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) define trauma as an emotional response to a terrifying or threatening event. Shockingly, over two-thirds of children in the United States experience some form of childhood trauma.
These early experiences can have a profound impact on our adult lives. They can affect our mental health, physical well-being, and relationships. Many children who experience trauma within their families (for example, with an alcoholic parent) develop coping mechanisms to feel safe. This might involve “walking on eggshells” or constantly trying to please the parent.
As adults, these patterns can resurface in our interactions with bosses, partners, or even friends. We may find ourselves drawn to “difficult people” and subconsciously recreate the dynamics of our childhood in a desperate attempt to gain approval and avoid conflict.
How can we heal? Teahan emphasizes the importance of breaking free from these harmful cycles. The healing process can be very individual and may include a combination of therapy, support groups, and other therapeutic approaches. Through these healing resources we learn to recognize our patterns and triggers, discern red flags in our relationships, and begin to act from an empowered place to set boundaries with difficult people.
At my practice at Limitless Potentials here in Jupiter, FL, I offer clients my FUN™ Program, which integrates psychotherapy with mind-body exercises and the brain-based therapies such as EMDR, Brainspotting, and Yoga Nidra. These therapy tools address the mindbody and can help transform lifelong patterns of negative beliefs and reactive responses, many of which are rooted in childhood trauma and express themselves in the present as physical and emotional distress.
You can read the article discussed in this blog here: https://www.aol.com/no-1-sign-childhood-trauma-170000257.html
You can learn more about what I do at Limitless Potentials here: https://limitlesspotentials.com
Keep falling awake, and have FUN™ with the journey…Dr. Kathy
